Before people tie the knot, they assume that the good things their partners portray during courtship will certainly continue to be exhibited in marriage, or that their partners won’t display any character, behaviour or action that would have counted as a red flag or deal breaker during courtship.
In many marriages, however, the reality is that these behavioural expectations are often not met. Some spouses tie the knot only to get surprised at their partners’ actions, behaviour or character. In today’s post we share with you one of such surprises—the ‘spirituality shock’.
For many Christians, one of the top qualities we look for in a spouse is spirituality. On the side of Christian women, they want a man who prays and can teach them the word of God; one whose spirituality poses a challenge to theirs. They want a man who can lead the family into God’s presence.
Christian men too want a spiritual woman; someone who can give spiritual support to the family and help bring the children up in the way of the Lord. For many Christians in ministry, it is an unavoidable quality.
In the quest to marry, some persons pretend to possess the quality of being spiritual. They do everything from being active in church, leading prayer sessions, moderating bible studies, or singing in the choir just to win the heart of a young man or lady.
They even join missions, but their motive is far from winning souls for the Lord. They want to win a soul for their selfish gain. But, if they are not found to be spiritual, how are they to accomplish their goal?
So you have this fine, charismatic, prayerful gentleman expressing interest in you; or you find a lady of same qualities accepting your proposal, and you are overwhelmed with joy. They can move the crowd, they can be seen praying feverishly in the deep of the night, they even possess an anointing that speaks volumes.
You get married and within the first year you wonder if this was the same person whose spirituality you ‘fell in love with’. You realize that he or she was not as spiritual after all. That is when it dawns on you that all this while, you had got the definition of ‘spiritual’ wrong.
In our next post we shall look at what it means to be ‘spiritual’, why some Christians fall into the ‘spirituality shock’ and how one can avoid this pit.
If you are married, you can share your experiences with us by clicking this link. Your confidentiality is assured.
Photo Credit: FreeImages.com/Mike Goodwin
This post is part of a series of lessons for the first year of marriage as part of our discipleship ministry, Mimesis Christou (find out more about this ministry here and here). The vision of Mimesis Christou is to raise young people to be effective, faithful followers of Jesus Christ. We believe that marriage has a bearing on how faithfully Christians walk with the Lord, hence the introduction of these lessons.
Broken link updated 26/12/2016